Jun. 24th, 2008

tania: (Cats - Sawyer: LOLZ!)

Courtesy of the awesome [livejournal.com profile] reaperfox over at [livejournal.com profile] doctorwhy.


Having now seen all of Doctor Who (new-who) seasons 1, 2 and 3, I'm prepared to give Torchwood another shot. Even though I still think it's like onscreen slash fanfiction. I didn't quite survive the entire first season last time but now that I actually know Jack's background via Doctor Who, there's a new level to it that wasn't there before. Even though it still plays out like FANGIRLY SLASH FICTION.

Seriously. I have some overly sexualised friends. The graph between me, Joey, Susan, Hammond, Marcie, Elizabeth et al over "who has snogged whom" and "who has slept with whom" would be interestingly tangled, but ye gods, we've got nothing on Torchwood.

If they spent as much time dealing with alien encounters as they did lusting after one another, the Doctor would be out of a... er... volunteer job?

Baahaahaa.... Face of Boe... *ded*
tania: (AAAUGH!)
When looking for visual reference for a leatherbound book in the photography category on deviantArt, do not type 'leather bound' into the search box.

[EDIT] In fact, avoid searching 'leather' at all.
tania: (Default)
I've had a two or three bad dreams lately about being back at Bond Street. I wouldn't call them nightmares... there's no zombies and/or apocalypse for a starters; what self-respecting nightmare lacks those?? There's no fear either, just stress (which arguably is a type of fear.) In the dreams Joe and I are trying to move out but can't find anywhere to go, and the situation just gets tougher and more stressful the harder we try. It's enough to wake me up, gasping, with a mild sense of panic that only calms down when I see the umbrella tree outside the window and remember where I am.

I really like it here. It's quiet, private, tidy, surrounded by nature. Oh, and very affordable... enough so that our hopes of saving a deposit and eventually buying a house are looking very realistic. Even more happily, I don't mind how long it takes to get that deposit... For once in my life I'm in no rush, and I'm not eagerly waiting for the Next Thing.

We do the housework thoughroughly every week, and everyone chips in with co-operation, enthusiasm and zero quibbling over who does what. Joe and I wash our dishes as we use them. Rick is getting a dishwasher soon anyway, which is pure Added Bonus in stainless-steel form. Rick and his dad made lots of progress on the cat run last weekend and Joe gave it a coat of paint yesterday. We'll be hanging the netting and releasing the kitties into faux-freedom and real sunlight this coming weekend.

Joe plays the piano every day; the improvement in all his songs is noticeable. The study needs one final coat of paint before we can shift our stuff in there, repaint the room we're currently using as bedroom, then spread out into both.

I run up the hill for the bus every morning, breath making little foggy clouds in the cold air - this part of Kenmore is high-up. A couple of mornings each week the world is swathed in fog and the sun looks like the moon.

Joe and I walk home together most nights, an hour-long trek that we spend chatting and debating and joking. I'm losing weight again... slowly, this time, healthily, with none of the urgency and deprivation I put myself through while working at Fuze. I feel attractive, confident and free. I'm neither pushing myself too hard nor being slack; it's as though my mind pendulum-swung back and forth between the two extremes for a few years before settling directly in the middle.

This is also the first time in my life I haven't had to worry about money.

This is a little golden age.

Forgive me for rambling like this. I see a lot of people posting about sadness and stress on Livejournal - have done it often myself, especially last year - and I want to be sure to balance that by giving a nod to the times in my life when I'm truly, deeply content. That doesn't mean I never have days when I'm tired, or stressed, or hormonal; no life is perfect and I think if it was, it would cease to have meaning.

After focusing on bad times I want to be able to appreciate the good times too. This is one of them.

That's kind of a big deal. I'm the sort of person who is easily happy but not easily content, it's what drives me to try harder, to advance and to achieve. I'll admit I'm a little afraid of what contentment will mean for me, but I'm going to wait and see before I make a judgement. It's time I gave myself a break and just enjoyed being alive, nothing more, nothing less.

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Tania Walker

August 2008

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